People in recovery dating sites
But my dates weren’t so comfortable with my beverage choice.Some guys were sweet, if a little confused: “You should have told me you don’t drink; we could have done something else!
Most of the websites have a specific part of the profile designated for stating the frequency of your alcohol use—and any preference about the frequency of your potential partner’s alcohol use, too. Not having to verbally inform every potential date that I don’t drink meant I didn’t have to disappoint some fella who couldn’t fathom dating a sober woman because “he liked to have fun.” (We sober women being the dull dishrags that we are).And while I can tolerate hanging out in a bar, it will never be my first choice destination.Given that bars are the unofficial “singles scene” for anyone aged 20 to 60, it’s easy to feel like you have to compromise the linchpins of your sobriety to have an active dating life.And I don’t have to waste my time figuring out that a guy can’t enjoy himself without polishing off a six-pack.Online dating can’t reveal who is right for you with a single click, but it can reveal who is Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, online dating kept me out of bars, protecting my sobriety.Some of the things that make it so difficult for people in recovery are the integration of abstinence, sobriety and boundary setting in a world of instant gratification where sensory overload can often be the very thing that set up the addictive pattern to begin with. The problem is that for many recovering addicts the original place where they learned how to relate was through role modeling from their dysfunctional family of origin.
Low self-esteem, fear of rejection, abandonment and fear of taking risks can often be a by product.
When it comes to dating, anything that allows me to be open about my sobriety and keeps me away from boozy locations and people is a good thing.
And if that thing happens to be online dating, there’s nothing embarrassing about that at all.
I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Addiction Specialist with over 20 years of experience currently offering dating coaching sessions for people who may be feeling anxious or ambivalent about dating or those who have been avoiding relationships all together.
I can help you to form your own individualized dating plan offering boundary setting, supportive guidance and direction.
” Other guys simply weren’t interested in dating a sober person.