Dating at 30 tips
And by pursuing a relationship more intentionally and with more maturity, your odds of finding lasting love are actually higher.
In your thirties, you’re cultivating friendships, passions, and a career. Know what you want; not just from a relationship, but from life.“You need to evaluate them and your chemistry together the same way you evaluated any new friends you might have made.” Especially if you’re meeting people on apps, it’s easy to project everything you want onto them while you’re chatting — and get way too excited about a date that falls flat within 10 seconds. In fact, if you’ve been waiting a long time then it’s even more important not to just date the first person who comes along.Don’t get too ahead of yourself and remember that there are always more options out there. “And you should know that you definitely do not need to settle,” Aimee explains.Single or with someone, life keeps getting better for those who embrace the adventure.Don’t let your relationship status limit your life, or your age limit your relationships.One of my friends, who didn’t have a relationship until a few months before her 30th birthday, stayed in that first horrible relationship for years. Well at that age, she told me, she thought it was her only chance. Lots of people start dating later— and there’s no reason to put up with a crap relationship just because you’re not 21 anymore.
So here’s what everyone in their 30s should know about dating.
Even though you haven’t dated before, you have had relationships with people in the form of family and friendships - and these have a lot in common.
“At that point [in your life], the best approach is to treat dating like making friends,” Aimee says.
If you’re a woman, you’re also now at your sexual peak. Learn to give each new date a fair shot, not holding them accountable for the sins of those who’ve gone before. Date someone who isn’t your type, try an activity outside of your comfort zone, and challenge yourself to address the stuck-in-your-ways habits that could keep others at arm’s length. Either you have them, want them, can’t have them, or don’t want them: all of these scenarios can result in awkward conversations. If you have kids, they need to be a huge consideration in your dating life.
If you don’t yet have kids, evaluate whether or not the desire to eventually procreate is a deal-breaker.
Just because your friends are at a different life stage doesn’t mean that you’re running to catch up. Learn to communicate your values and dreams without bitterness or urgency. You’re aware of your strengths and weaknesses, as will your date be aware of his/hers.